Sandwich   Leave a comment


A turkey sandwich implies two slices of bread separated primarily by meat from a turkey.

An ice cream sandwich implies a prism of ice cream insulated to the north and south by soft, chocolate-flavored cookies, perforated for maximum ventilation.

Sitting in lecture with an occupied seat to the left, and an occupied seat to the right- a lumbering mouth-breather with an open plate of gastric curry on one side, and a blustering airhead texting nonstop on the other, does not a “moron sandwich” make.

A sandwich is defined by its filling, not by its bread. When analogies are made, this should be taken into consideration. I don’t know the term for an inverted sandwich, a calzone is an uninspired analogy, a bread sandwich or inverted sandwich lack phonetic grace- but I must re-emphasize that the middle of your sandwich is what defines it.

We have, in our culture, a strong affinity for sandwiches; they hold a cherished position in our collective psyche. Mom made ’em for us to take for lunch for twelve years, at least. What could be better than a domestic, angelic, fragrant-haired friend making you one right now? We’ve learned we can lose 200 lbs. by eating at Subway. We love sandwiches. Their specific manner of delicious layering and efficiency fills us with happiness and pride. That’s what makes us want to compare any instance where we have one unique thing surrounded by two like things, to a sandwich. But to invert this model is a perversion of the architectural beauty a sandwich represents.

There’s a reason the bread is on the outside and the meat/other fillings on the inside. The bread protects the filling, compliments it’s texture, provides a multi-purpose frame, and a sense of completeness. These virtues should be transferred to all types of sandwiches, edible and analogous.

It’s the inside’s what matters in character and sandwich, so far as I’m concerned, defining a sandwich by its bread is unacceptable. It’s like a Big Mac lacking a top and bottom bun- not a sight to behold.

The exception is a knuckle sandwich, which lacks discernible layers of filling and bread, yet constitutes an acceptable usage of the term “sandwich”, explicably by its aura of delight.

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Posted January 19, 2010 by Wada in Uncategorized

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